So there is but fire In you, in me?

I was awake at 3am. Reading archaic ghost stories. Became possessed by the idea that nothing in the world would be lovelier at that moment than to be perfectly clean, literally smelling of roses. The idea would not leave me... So I went downstairs To put water in the bath - a laborious affair as the cold tap doesn't work so I have to add cold water via a bucket filled from the sink... And a spider Large spider Was in the bath. In my state of semi-conscious, dream thinking, surely this bath idea was a subliminal broadcast from the trapped beasty. I got a glass, liberated the spider but only because by now there was no going back. The bath now spider-less, containing a shallow drenching of hot water I lit an incense stick and some candles And settled myself in the clean water, perfumed with roses. Because I didn't really want to enter the day unprepared. By 10:30 am I was back home Today was the scattering of the ashes. We processed, following the man wi

Alien Covenant had placed itself in the same mental folder as Covenant the band, in my mind. Because a film that centers on the 'synths' of the Alien franchise brought to my mind the themes Covenant (the band) have so magnificently explored. Dreams of a Cryotank to Dead Stars. The glorious, intellectual isolation described in the song Babel serves as a perfect backdrop for the moment when David (the synth left to figure out the controls of the alien spacecraft in Prometheus) is hovering above the progenitors...though by then I guess David has figured out that he is closer to the daemons than 'a saint in disguise'. But despite the glorious Xplus sound and visuals of the cinema screen -  Alien Covenant proved itself to be an unsatisfying film. No fault of the actors, or the way it was filmed, no. My chief criticism is this; the characters in the film were less real to me than those in the game, Alien Isolation.  This is significant because a computer game

I began writing a diary so many years ago. Aged about 10 Obsessed by the implications of living in a country that had... Foxes! Miraculous! I began to hope for Wolves! I looked at dog foot-prints in the snow Growing larger under the sun. I Believed Wolves played in the garden Walked the roads and pathways Between the trees Between the houses... Invisible Friends of loyalty, faith. Fierce speakers of the emotional... Howl And I loved the wolves I was their lost child It had been the human eye Psychological forces of inexpressible, hidden sorrow and pain That had snared me And I decided to always write The truth To untie the wolves caged in the soul. And see through my wolf eye Truth is an oblique ray Seeking the dim form at the edge of the light... Those forces - projected onto me -  needed form. They had been the reason I was left to cry Silent for fear of waking my parents Paralyzed by fear The black rings around my eyes.. Self